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Instantly Control Your Husband Mints

Instantly Control Your Husband Mints

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Instantly Control Your Husband Mints

Is your husband getting annoying? Did he “forget” to put the seat down again or neglect to take the garbage out? He needs a little mental reeducation, so give him a few Instantly Control Your Husband Mints. Watch as all those chores and repairs you’ve been asking him to do for six months suddenly get done. Is football watching getting in the way of a little cuddle time? These mints will have him on the couch holding a bottle of wine and a DVD copy of “Steel Magnolias.” He’ll be under your total control -- as it should be.

HypYESis

With Instantly Control Your Husband Mints, “no” won’t be in his vocabulary. “Will you please wash the car?” “Sure, I’ll do that right now; I don’t want to watch this action movie anyway.” He’ll be putty in your hands with these mints. This is something every man should have…for his own good. This is really all about his best interests.

Specs, Features, and Bragging Rights

- Hilarious tin filled with wintergreen mints and wishful thinking

- Collectable tin reads: Instantly Control Your Husband Mints

- Doesn’t actually give you control over your husband, but it will lighten your mood and the mints will freshen your breath

- Contains approximately 165 mints

Who Would Love Instantly Control Your Husband Mints?

This is the one gift every wife needs. Although, it’s probably not going to come from her husband. Every woman that feels abandoned during football season or waits impatiently for her husband to remember their anniversary and Valentine’s Day will find this a necessary tool for control…er…happiness. Did we mention it’s for his own good?

Frequently Asked Questions

Will this work for lazy husbands?

Aren’t all husbands lazy when it comes to doing work at home? You don’t have to do the dishes. You don’t have to do the laundry. This is a partnership. You should make him get off his duff and take a little initiative with the house. This is all about marriage equality and making sure he knows how important you are. And mints. Lots and lots of mints.

Should I just give him the whole box?

While Instantly Control Your Husband Mints are delicious, it’s probably a good idea to only give him a few at a time. You don’t want a zombie husband blindly doing anything and everything you say do you? Ok, that’d be pretty awesome, but still, the key is moderation. You know you’ll need to save some for later.

Why We Love It

— Jessi, Funslurp Buyer Jessi, Funslurp Buyer

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