The Constipation Crisis Kit

The Constipation Crisis Kit

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As we get older, bowel movements come about as frequently as the equinox, and every now and then you’re going to get a little stuffed up. The Constipation Crisis Kit is here to make your time on the toilet as positive and life affirming as possible.

It doesn’t matter if your sphincter is closed tighter than a bank vault or if that peeker is playing turtle but refusing to drop – you’re covered!

The Constipation Crisis Kit contains a sign letting people know to expect a delay, a glass to rehydrate with a little prune juice, and a roll of affirmation toilet paper. You’ll be rolling deuces in no time.


16 x 10 x 19 cm


We’ve all had those days when things didn’t “come out how we planned.” Maybe you ate too much cheese, or think fiber is a dirty word? We love The Constipation Crisis Kit because being stopped up can leave you feeling alone and full of… remorse. It’s great to have this handy kit to turn to when you’re yearning for a crappy ending.


Why We Love It

— Jessi, Funslurp Buyer Jessi, Funslurp Buyer


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